... make a bet in a drinking game that, if lost, would allow his buddies to set his prosthetic leg on fire.

Details

P.S. An update on the story suggests that it was a crack pipe, and not a drinking game, that ignited the incident, but that just didn't fit the meme here. And, yes, this story could also appear on The Naked Thread.

A father, who was under the influence of alcohol, dove into a swimming pool from a truck and died early Sunday morning, the Harris County Sheriff�s Office said.

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Scott - I am so disappointed that the article you posted in July is no longer there. That just seemed like a great icebreaker for my class. LOL

The defibrillator was still missing? What could that possibly be used for?

I'm thinking terrorizing the family dog.

Catfishing.

I suspect not simultaneously with noodling, however!

...wear a diaper and go trick-or-treating at 47 years of age.

drunken diaper-wearing trick-or-treater causes disturbance

At 3 a.m. the officer, who has turned on his videocamera, pulls up behind a car on a major highway. The unusual part is that the car is parked half in the right lane and half on the shoulder. The officer gets out of his vehicle, goes up to the driver side while nervously looking over his shoulder to check for oncoming traffic and bangs on the driver's door several times to no avail. He finally opens the driver's door and shakes the driver saying "Sir, sir, are you okay?" Driver says "hello?" Officer says "please pull your car over and get off the highway." After a pause the officer says "you have to put it in drive sir." Next thing you know driver screeches off at full speed. By the time the officer jumps in his car, driver is a dot on the horizon. Officer gives chase, and a mile down the road the car turns on blinker and pulls over completely onto shoulder. Officer gets out and asks driver to please step out of car. Driver is bewildered and says "why are you pulling me over?" Officer says "sir, why did you drive off back there?" Driver says "what are you talking about, officer?" Officer says "about a mile back you just drove off." Driver says "I'm sorry I didn't see you until just now, as soon as I did I pulled over." (????) Officer can't figure out if the guy is being a smartass or is so drunk he doesn't really remember. The officer then says "Sir, have you been drinking? You have a stamp on your hand, and that usually means you've been at a club." Driver says "Really? that means I've been at a club? Are you sure because I was at home." Officer gives up at this point and just arrests him without further discussion. I am not sure how the driver planned on explaining the videotape of the entire incident.

Breathalyzer Costume

That just goes to show the things don't work. Ask any DWI defense attorney.

...urinate on a police car.

quote:

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Police gave Cruz a field sobriety test and then arrested him. That's when he urinated on the cruiser.

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...pick up her husband at the police station (after he had been arrested on drunk driving charges). Oh, and after she had already been released to go home with instructions not to drive.

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My favorite line: "I'm ------- drunk, I was driving but I did not run the stop sign. That ----- hit me."

Gee, I wonder what the dashes are for. Let's play Mad Libs (or hangman), shall we?

BARTLESVILLE, Oklahoma -- A 41-year-old Bartlesville man being arraigned in Washington County District Court Monday for DUI, leaving the scene of an accident, driving under suspension and assault on a police officer was re-arrested for reportedly being drunk after he fell down before the judge.

A short time later, Mark Watson failed a breathalyzer test administered by sheriff's deputies.

web page

...take his goat on a date.

"Drunk driver: I am escorting my lonely goat on a date, officer
Astonished police who stopped a car for drink driving found a horny goat in the passenger seat being taken on a date by his farmer owner."

Goat article

...marinade his chicken IN the grocery store...
this unusual way.

As the officer administers the HGN:

"Can I just tell you something? You like, totally need a manicure." Complete with stumble forward, head bob and hand gesture emphasis.

Having sex at 85 miles per hour while drunk on a freeway is willful and wanton negligence.

(Somebody had to fill the shoes of a certain congressman....)

quote:

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Originally posted by APorter:

(Somebody had to fill the shoes of a certain congressman....)

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"Shoes"?

... her breasts.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/03/woman-blames-drunk-driving-on-breasts_n_1253080.html