Lawyer: Ex-Astronaut Didn't Wear Diaper
By MIKE SCHNEIDER
Associated Press Writer
ORLANDO, Fla. � An attorney for a former astronaut wanted to set the record straight Friday: Lisa Nowak didn't wear diapers during the 950-mile road trip to confront a romantic rival.

"The biggest lie in this preposterous tale that has been told is that my client drove from Houston, Texas, to Orlando, Florida, nonstop, wearing a diaper," Donald Lykkebak said after filing motions to suppress evidence in Nowak's criminal case. "That is an absolute fabrication."

"I don't know how anyone could fall for this," Lykkebak added. "There is absolutely no similarity between a diaper and a coffee can."

I'm guessing he decined to address the issue -- at the risk of having to elaborate -- of the "party favors" Capt. Nowak supposedly had in the trunk.

"That is an absolute fabrication...". So, they come in Depends, Huggies Seniors and "Absolute Fabrication" (can't wait for the commercial and its little ditty: Gentle on My Hind").

Okay, okay, exit only for crying out loud.

Of course it wasn't a diaper. Don't be silly. Anyone can buy those for $5.00 a package. A true bona-fide astronaut would never be caught dead in an ordinary diaper.

What she was wearing is a government contract procured "Adult Moisture Containment and Suppression Device" that costs $1350 per unit.

quote:

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What she was wearing is a government contract procured "Adult Moisture Containment and Suppression Device" that costs $1350 per unit.

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ROFLOL, in bad need of ADMCASD. (Check quote.) Also, your price per unit is probably low, what with development costs and testing.

Of course "That is an absolute fabrication". The HEB store she stopped at enroute was fresh out of adult diapers, thus she had to purchase the doggie pee pads that dogs are supposed to go on.

Using her Nasa astronaut ingenuity, she created adult diapers, using duct tape, some dry cleaning plastic bags and the garter belt from her french maid outfit stockings.

Police: Bag found at school contained fruit, not fetus
11:38 AM CDT on Friday, June 29, 2007

From Staff Reports
Investigators have determined that the contents of a black bag found at a Dallas middle school this week contained rotting oranges and not a dead fetus.

The Dallas County medical examiner's office examined the contents and made the determination, Dallas police said Friday. [And what sort of testing distinguishes a fetus from a bag of fruit?]

The bag was discovered inside a locker at Benjamin Franklin Middle School in the 6900 block of Meadow Road.

John, if you're going to start linking to articles where the media gets something in a story wrong, this thread will rival your "A Frog is a Deadly Weapon" thread and Jane's "Corroboration, Cowwobowation" thread -- combined!

Excelllllllent.