An idea was floated (no keg jokes, please) at the Elected Prosecutors hootenanny for an "event" at a future Annual. Said "event" would consist of performance by prosecutors or others who are members of the association and who have musical talent. Obviously, that leaves me out. However, I did agree to gauge interest in the idea. Though some of us with hearing damaged by Marshall/Fender/Peavy amplifiers have chosen to forego music as a primary career (harkening to the wise words of a blues musician friend of mine -- "be a professional musician and earn hundreds of dollars a year"), what say you of the musical ilk? Is there any interest in this idea? I would've e-mailed those of you I know (whether you would admit you know me or not), but I'm too technologically inept to correctly operate a listserve. If you're interested, you can either post or e-mail me directly.

I am not musically inclined, but I think it is an excellent idea. Maybe a performance during a luncheon? Or poolside at Padre?

As to timing, I can only suggest a later engagement, evinced by the slogan of a loosely-associated group with whom I used to "play" -- "Keep drinking. The more you drink, the better we sound."

If I can get my hand out of this catfish's mouth, so I could get into my gig bag, I'd be willing to come embarass - embbarass - emb -- make a fool of myself in front of everybody.
And like the T-shirt says: "No money, junk vehicle, no real job, but I am in a band".

Scott and AP, we have spoken about this before. I'm down for the drum section. We have a bassist who is also a banjoist. Surely amongst our ego-filled ranks there is a competent lead singer.

Don't forget, David Newell and John Harrity of Fort Bend are six stringers, and Harrity even has a strat, just like Scott. They will profess to be poor musicians, but were in fact both labeled as a child prodigy by their respective music teachers. Newell is more of a punk rocker, but Harrity listens to all of the right stuff.

If we have to, we can get a ringer (or two) that looks like a prosecutor or prosecutrix...and then we can get AP to make up the name of the "little known" East or West Texas County they work in...

[This message was edited by Greg Gilleland on 12-29-05 at .]

I'd offer my horn to this revival but I'm afraid I haven't played in years. I would have to put some type of warning label/announcement before any performance. I'm sure Greg & the Gang would make a great gig at any TDCAA event (keg included).

I would welcome a horn section (it could lend a Little Feat-esque or Roomful of Blues sound, or maybe even a hint of the Coral Reefer Horns). The only problem I recall with horn players is that they dramatically increase the band's aggregate beer consumption.

A.P.: I'm impressed that you have a gig bag for a banjo. You're hired. As an aside, do you keep your noodling (or, as it's called in my part of the world, "grabblin'") gear in your bag, as well?

Greg: I once sang lead for a questionable conglomeration of law students known as the "Ruthless Funk Bastards." As is true with my guitar playing, I stunk -- hence the band motto recounted above. A lawyer up here who is a much better musician than I can imagine being has talked about striking up a combo known as "Voir Dire Straits," but we're concerned that Amarillo city ordinances may negatively impact my ability to sing if amplification is used. I would look forward to Newell's participation, but I'm not angry enough with my dad to sing much modern rock. Maybe he can choreograph a little Beastie Boys for us. In any event, if nobody steps forward, I suppose I could DH. Surely we have an American Idol out there among our ranks.

Why not let the prosecutors kick back and relax. Invite the Austin Bar Association's Bar and Grill Singers ( a group of 10-12 Austin area lawyers with three CDs to their credit). They are very very good.

Janette Ansolabehere

I'm up for it. Several of us do actually moonlight on occasion as musicians. I don't have any cd's to my credit, however, I am ready to play music with a few fellow tdcaa'ers, whether it be for others or for us.

I have discussed this same project separately with Scott and AP during the past year and a half, and I think we should do it.

And Michael in SA, it's never too late to get those horn skills back in shape.

Thanks Greg for the encouragement!

M.D., Does that mean you're pulling out the horn and listening to lots of blues and rock records to hone those not so long gone trumpet skills?

QUOTE:

Why not let the prosecutors kick back and relax. Invite the Austin Bar Association's Bar and Grill Singers ( a group of 10-12 Austin area lawyers with three CDs to their credit). They are very very good.

Janette Ansolabehere

A banjo player and a trombone player have a New Year's Eve gig. Everything is going very well, and the people at the party really enjoy the evening. They go to get paid and the buyer says, "You know, we enjoyed you both so much, everyone had such a great time listening to your music. We were wondering if perhaps we could have you guys back to play at our New Year's Eve party next year?"The banjo player and trombone player look at each other, "Gee that's great. Everyone was so nice. We had fun. Your party was great.... sure.... Can we leave our stuff here?"

Being a former bass player, I can respond with this bit of bass humor:

Q. What do you call a bass player who doesn't have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

A. Homeless.

And I must agree that I am disheartened by Janette's vote of "no confidence." I know Austin standards are lofty, but gee whiz.

Good joke, Scott, although when I told it to A.P. last year, it was a drummer joke. But here's some more bass and drums humor, with the additional obligatory banjo joke:
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What do you call a pretty lady on a drummers arm? A tattoo
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Two drummers walk past a bar..... Hey, it could happen!
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A couple goes to see a marriage counselor. They say their marriage is on the rocks because they never speak to each other.
The counselor tries to get them to talk, but they just sit there with their arms folded and their mouths closed. He tries playing games. He tries tricking them. Nothing he can do can get them to talk to each other.
Finally, he pulls out an electric bass and starts playing a solo.
Instantly, the couple turns to each other and starts conversing for the first time in months.
"How on earth did you know that would work?" they ask.
"Simple," he says, "Everyone always talks during the bass solo."
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A banjo player, who has been out of work for months, is desperate for work. He's looking through the want ads and he comes across a position with the local zoo.
"Here's the deal," explains the zoo manager when the banjo player arrives at his office. "We've advertised that we have two gorillas at our zoo, but one of the apes just died. We hate to disappoint all the kids, who are expecting to see two gorillas. All you have to do is put on this gorilla suit and sit in the cage."
The man puts on the furry suit, and is sitting in the cage eating a banana when the door opens and another gorilla is shoved in with him.
"Get me outta here!" yells the man, shaking the bars of the cage.
"Keep quiet," says the other gorilla. "You think you're the only banjo player out of work?"
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Now you've done it, Greg. You've forced me to dip into my "gig bag" of musician jokes. Given my prior failed stints as a bass player and guitarist, and my affinity for A.P.'s chosen instrument, I offer the following:

Q. What is a "perfect pitch" for a banjo?
A. Throwing it into the toilet without hitting the rim.

Q. How do you get two guitar players to play in perfect unison?
A. Shoot one.

Q. Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune?
A. Neither did I.

Q. How do you get a guitar player off your front porch?
A. Pay for the pizza.

Q. What do you do if your bassist is drowning?
A. Throw him his amp.

Q. How many guitarists does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughn tune?
A. Evidently all of them.

Q. What do a vacuum cleaner and an electric guitar have in common?
A. Both suck when you plug them in.

Q. How do you know the stage is level?
A. The bassist is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.

Q. What's the difference between a pizza and an Austin musician?
A. A pizza can feed a family of four.

Your jokes are great, Scott, especially the Stevie Ray one. But the funniest statement on this thread, also by Scott, is not meant to be a joke but instead a quote:

"...harkening to the wise words of a blues musician friend of mine -- "be a professional musician and earn hundreds of dollars a year."

I have repeated this to several full-time Austin blues musician friends, and it always has the same result...total understanding and a big huge smile. Sad but true.

Scott, you're the ringmaster for this circus, as well as the melody master. Pick a songlist and let us know.

At the risk of raining down upon myself as much hate mail as I used to receive when I worked for the college newspaper, why don't all who are interested e-mail me (my e-mail address can be found in my member profile information) and I'll compile something of a listserve? Then we can begin hashing out a playlist and trying to figure out the logistics of getting together somewhere to practice (and hear how bad I really am -- but, using the same logic often applied when speaking to people in other countries who don't understand much English, I'm really loud).

Scott,

I am tossing in Duncan Thomas, Hunt County District Attorney, for service in the band. He is a talented musician (Great bass player and singer). He still plays in several bands up here.

I mentioned your idea to him when I got back from San Antonio and he is a willing participant.

Can't wait to hear the band....if ya'll get signed to a record deal and go on the road can I get a gig as a roadie?