Police said a 38-year-old man was charged with beating another man at a motel with a sauce bottle and a fire extinguisher.

Details.

Mad emu attacks deputies in El Paso

El Paso authorities say the big bird was running loose Tuesday, snarling rush-hour traffic near Interstate 10 and attacking deputies trying to restrain it.

Deputies with the El Paso County Sheriff's Office tried to prevent the tall, flightless bird from running into traffic. But when deputies neared the emu, it became aggressive and slashed one deputy's pant leg.

A mad llama or a mad emu? Both have attacked recently.

In the late 90s it became a trendy thing for "gentlemen farmers" where we lived in North Texas to keep emus. There were brochures at the feed stores as to how they'd make you rich rich rich selling emu oil for cosmetics and lean, low fat emu meat. Of course a few years later the emu oil market was saturated and everyone had figured out that emu tastes like turkey- only more bland and stringy.

So one day in 1998 or so a guy let all of his emus out on I-20 in Weatherford. Just opened up a trailer full of them, shooed them out into the median, and drove off. The sheriff's posse spent a few hours rounding them up on horseback. The Washington Post even wrote up a front page article on it.

The sheriff called up a local emu rancher who took the abandoned birds and added them to his own worthless flock. They in turn called a local butcher and offered to share the meat if they'd butcher the worthless birds. The butcher, in turn, called my Dad to try and do something with all the emu meat. At the time, my Dad owned a chuckwagon that he did cowboy style catering out of and had a reputation for performing minor miracles in the barbecue pit. My Dad ended up cooking about 20 birds worth of emu meat and then dividing it up three ways between us, the rancher, and the butcher.

And that, my friends, is why I cannot stand to look at a damn emu.

Yep, they look better in the Australian outback, where they belong with the 'roos and wallabies.

Internet-obsessed couple starve baby

SEOUL (AFP) - A South Korean couple left their baby daughter to starve to death at home while playing an Internet game which simulated child-rearing, police said Friday.

The man aged 41 and his 25-year-old wife were arrested Thursday, five months after they reported the death of their three-month-old baby, a police investigator in the city of Suweon just south of Seoul told AFP.

Wow. And here I thought my weird dream (nightmare, it was scary at the time) of forgetting to feed my baby due in June was really far fetched. I guess I shouldn't leave Dad at home alone with the baby if he is playing Rock Band. Ironic that the game had to do with a baby?

A woman in jail for public intoxication was accused of assaulting a jailer by squirting breast milk at her.

Details.

JB, I'm sure you just made Suzanne feel oh-so-much better. You just gave her a new topic of nightmare.

Yes, actually, he did!

I just noticed that breast milk is not covered by TPC 22.11. Even though this happened in Kentucky, are our representatives going to be outraged enough to make a legislative change? I mean, it's made national headlines (sort of - if it's here, it counts).

I'd actually like to see what the Tattletale reports on the incident. If it gets Tattletale attention, then the leg would *have* to take action on it.

Man commits suicide with a souvenir pencil

(The things I learn from Fark.com. )

The headline is less bizarre than the first sentence: "A window cleaner died after stabbing himself in the groin repeatedly with a jumbo souvenir pencil, an inquest heard."

So not just any pencil, but a giant pencil. (And one we later find out belonged to his mother. And was blunt. Ow.) And not only did he stab himself with it, he did so in the groin. Repeatedly. What on Earth was he on?!

"When police broke into his house they found Mr Burton lying on his back, wearing only his underpants."

And he only had a single psychotic episode in 2006.

[This message was edited by Ray on 03-10-10 at .]

I know I couldn't get the first stab in, much less multiple times.

Maybe the incident adds credence to the line about "only mad dogs and Englishmen."

The cleansing of the police department could be a motive behind a death threat made against Ju�rez Mayor Jos� Reyes Ferriz.

City officials said that the mayor's security team was looking into the threat and that security had been increased.

"We know the topic of cleaning up the police to have a trustworthy department is something that has affected a lot of criminal interests and we take very seriously these" threats, Reyes said in a statement.

Reyes has been threatened before.

Wednesday morning, a pig's head was found next to a sign for the mayor stating in part "you have two weeks left to live," the Internet news Web site arrobajuarez.com reported.



The rest of the story from the El Paso Times

IOWA CITY, Iowa (AP) - Iowa City police arrested a woman who allegedly attacked her sister with the lid of a toilet tank.

Details.

That's a really crappy thing to do.

It stinks.